The best unsolicited advice you never asked for
Pretty much everybody has at least one piece of advice that they got from a parent or teacher or boss that has stuck with them over a lifetime. Or somehow, it keeps popping up as words to live by, especially in challenging times. Some of these have become little treasures that we’ve passed on to our children. Our Thursday night zoom group of loyal perfect avocados has been working our way through the March book group pick Share You Stuff, I’ll Go First by Laura Tremaine, and last week we did the exercise What are your 10 Pieces of Unsolicited Advice?
This week, I’m laying some serious wisdom on you - print it out and put it on your wall, because you’ll come back to this one over and over. I’m pretty sure you’ll find at least one pearl that you will want to share with someone right away. So, without further ado, here it goes:
Embrace change.
Take a breath - in all circumstances, you will be served by just taking a deep breath.
Kids can do more than you think (7-year-olds can do laundry and pack their own lunch)
Get regular massages.
Take girls trips.
Keep a daily gratitude journal.
Alternate water with cocktails.
Apply for the job you think is above you.
However the interview process goes, that’s what it’s like to work there.
Hire coaches in all areas of life, work, parenting, money, health.
Open a Roth IRA when you are young and contribute as much as you can every month.
Don’t lie.
Go to bed and get off the screen.
Leave room for grace - divine intervention can happen when you least expect it.
Assume ignorance over malice.
You can have it all, you just can’t have it all at once.
Go with your gut.
Sometimes the only way through is through. (AKA, if you’re going through Hell, keep going)
In the middle of a disaggeement, ask yourself, “do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?”.
Take risks - do one thing every day that scares you.
Start where you are. Credit Pema Chodran
Make a point to have one good laugh a day.
Let that shit go.
Be your own person.
Have dinner together as a family.
Travel! This is how you learn about the world.
Never take a job for money.
Keep work conversations short - it’s ok to say “I have 10 minutes”.
How you feel about yourself is how other people see you.
Live each moment.
Have all different kinds of friends.
Don’t take things too personally.
Tell the truth, especially when you don’t know what to say.
Things change. As bad as it is, or as good as it is right now - things do not stay the same.
Ask for what you want, and the hard part is KNOWING what you want.
Get financially smart early. Thirty years go by in a blink.
Buy a duplex or a triplex.
Read.
Spend time in nature and with nature, not on your phone in nature.
Forgive, yourself, your parents, your siblings, your boss, your ex. Let it go, because holding on, keeps you stuck there. Forgive them for yourself.
Listen more than you speak.
There are some things that you say and some things that you think.
Bonus
You did the best you knew how at the time.
Three-word-zen two versions:
Be here now
This then that
And of course, nowadays, the best piece of advice is to wear a mask and wash your hands. I’m 100% sure that you too have at least one piece of unsolicited advice to add to this list - please post on social media and tag Perfect Avocado Retreats and use the hashtag #PerfectAvocadoAdvice.