Ever notice how the big changes in our lives so often serve as the catalyst for big growth. We need something to really shake things up in order to propel us forward. For me, this is the embodiment of the Buddhist precept of impermanence. When life is chugging along - work, friendships, parenting, partnership, it feels normal and inevitable. As if it will just continue this way forever. So, when the big change comes along in whatever form it takes, we are taken aback, jolted into a new reality.
In truth, change is inevitable, not permanence.
When change is forced upon us, we scramble to try to fix it, try to reassemble that nice ‘normal’ feeling and finally come to the realization that it won’t/can’t happen. That normal feeling is gone. It finally comes to us that normal is ephemeral, almost illusory. There is the urge to grasp, but there is nothing to cling to. Change has come and nothing is the same, ever again. We’ve all heard the expression Before and After. Before I got married, Before I had children, Before my father died. Before 911. And After.
Once we finally let go of the grasping and the scrambling, then there is often a quest. We long for something new and real and perhaps unimaginable. I once had a conversation with a friend who’d lost her house in a fire and we were comparing notes on loss, as I was recently divorced. We came to the astonishing realization that this was a time of feeling really alive. Surviving change is like that - a time of feeling raw, unadulteratedly and brilliantly alive. And that feeling my dear friends is growth.
Change can take many forms, as we are all too familiar - divorce, marriage, empty nest, loss of a job, relocation, death of a best friend, parent or partner. But even change that comes from choice has its unexpected consequences - a new job results in the lost connections from the old one; a new marriage comes with the loss of privacy; children bring joy and chaos.
What we offer in a Perfect Avocado Retreat is the opportunity to swim in that cold water with like-minded women tired of the grasping who are ready for growth. These are women who are ready to do some shaking of their own. Ready to reach out and grab hold of their someday daydreams and begin to turn them into reality.
My partner in Perfect Avocado Retreats love, love, loves change! Amy’s mantra is “I love change, and you can too”. Her gift is to bring that enthusiasm for change to the world. And why not, since it’s gonna happen anyway? You can hear her ideas on all that on the Let’s #BeReal podcast using any of the following links:
We’re curious what have been the big changes that have lead to your big growth? Let us know in the comments below.